One Letter Can't Do The Trick Conclusion

So, the damsel of our story -

Oh wait, I woke up Wednesday morning trying to grasp the reality of all that transpired during the previous day - knowing I had to do my best to conceal all the emotions churning inside me - but that wasn't anything out of the ordinary for me - I had learned to do that to survive -

I stuck to my story of having some loose ends to tie up as the reason for the delay in my arrival - I disliked having to fib as I was but it was necessary -

The day's routine was the usual - some computer time - shower - mid-day meal before heading to work - my normal routine for the 3-11 shift had me leave the house around 2pm to allow for traffic, grab a coffee, and exchange information with the tech(s) I was relieving - I was never a clockwatcher - yet, that counted for nothing -

Instead of heading to what I now refer to as The Gulag, I headed to S's office - where I sat - still kind of shellshocked about what had happened and what was YET to happen as we began to work on a rough draft of a resume for me -

Having worked on that for a while, it was time to face my past and my future - I'll admit the stomach was churning as I contemplated what the next hours held for me - I was about to see my parents for the first time in about ten years or so - and I was about to leave a home I loved, my Sibes I adored, and a spouse I realised I had settled for -

And as I've touched on here before, something I won't do again: SETTLE -

Since S had other commitments for the evening - and couldn't be there for all of it - we drove separately to my mom's - honestly, I can't tell you the last time I had been there - even though my house down the street was only one mile away - but I was now home - my mom had her eldest child back - years were lost but it didn't matter -

My dad came over a bit later - S had left by then so they didn't get to meet -that would take place a few days later - my parents had divorced during the time I was 'away from my family' as I term it - I thanked them for their help, understanding, and support -

And off we went - the mile drive was too short yet way too long as I tried to come to terms with what I was about to do - what I had to do -

I rang the bell - I said we needed to talk - and very quickly, 24 years of my life came to an abrupt halt - I had met the now ex in 1980 - we married in 1991 - and December 8, 2004 marked the end -

I have felt such relief from these three posts - I do think the fifth anniversary of it all marked a 'milestone' of sorts - I think this year will mark the closure in needing to 'dwell' on it - to remind myself of it - yet I will never see the reference to Pearl Harbour Day without thinking of mine -

The five girls I left are now four - and probably in the coming months, the four will become three -

I have a sister and brothers again - they missed me whilst I was gone -

I have Khyra - and I think all of you know what she means to me - and how I wouldn't know all of you without her -

S is still a major part of my life - I still thank him frequently for helping me and saving me - he reminds me I always had the strength to do it - maybe I did, maybe I didn't -

Things really do happen for reasons - even if we don't see them at the time -

Thanks for the comments - the support - the understanding - the respect for my actions even if you don't/didn't agree - one never knows what one will do until it happens to them -